haunted house

January 9, 2014 at 9:10 am 14 comments

for friday fictioneers 100-word challenge 10 january 2014


photo credit: dawn q. landau

kirsten’s family iived by the ocean. when the announcement came to evacuate due to an approaching storm, they didn’t.

the storm arrived howling like nothing kirsten had heard before. suddenly, there was a loud bang. when her dad opened the door to investigate, he was killed by the surging waters. as kirsten clung to a post, her mom drowned trying to reach her.

for years, kirsten was coming to their house or whatever was left of it. the villagers thought it was haunted, but she knew better. if it was haunted, it was haunted by the memory of happier times.

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wordless wednesday: gone but not forgotten weekly photo challenge: window

14 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Jan Brown  |  January 9, 2014 at 1:54 pm

    A very poignant story, and a lovely response to the prompt. Well done.

    Reply
    • 2. plaridel  |  January 9, 2014 at 3:28 pm

      jan:

      thank you for reading. i really appreciate it.

      Reply
  • 3. lingeringvisions by Dawn  |  January 9, 2014 at 3:31 pm

    I love the last line!

    Reply
    • 4. plaridel  |  January 9, 2014 at 4:38 pm

      dawn:

      so glad you liked it. :)

      Reply
  • 5. Sandra  |  January 9, 2014 at 11:40 pm

    A nice response to the prompt.

    Reply
    • 6. plaridel  |  January 10, 2014 at 4:28 pm

      sandra:

      what a nice response to my story. thank you. :)

      Reply
  • 7. rochellewisoff  |  January 10, 2014 at 1:12 am

    dear plaridel,

    good use of 100 words. poignant.

    shalom,

    rochelle

    Reply
    • 8. plaridel  |  January 10, 2014 at 4:29 pm

      rochelle:

      the raw draft was about 300 words long. you couldn’t imagine how hard it was to condense it in 100 words. a lot were left unsaid.

      Reply
  • 9. kz  |  January 10, 2014 at 7:56 am

    “if it was haunted, it was haunted by the memory of happier times.” a wonderful last line :)

    Reply
    • 10. plaridel  |  January 10, 2014 at 4:31 pm

      kz:

      you won’t believe it, but it came to me while trying to fit the story in 100 words.

      Reply
  • 11. freyathewriter  |  January 10, 2014 at 8:24 am

    What a beautiful last line. Peace is achieved when you can remember the joys more than the pain.

    Reply
    • 12. plaridel  |  January 10, 2014 at 4:33 pm

      freya:

      thank you for taking the time to read. i deeply appreciate it.

      Reply
  • 13. Linda Vernon  |  January 10, 2014 at 9:06 am

    Haunted by good memories. Great concept.

    Reply
    • 14. plaridel  |  January 10, 2014 at 4:39 pm

      linda:

      actually, i’d like to say that kirsten was haunting the house, but the word limit constrained me. so, the story had to end that way.

      Reply

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