The Company-Induced Training Brouhaha

August 28, 2009 at 1:21 pm 8 comments


 
Most employees nowadays are required to take at least 30 hours of training every year to keep them from becoming obsolete. Except for sexual harassment and diversity training, they can all be termed as”boring” for lack of a politically correct word. But what’s the problem? You still get paid for attending, anyway. Right? Nothing boring about that!

This mandatory training can be a welcome treat. It’s a time when you get out of your cubicle and socialize with your co-workers in a non-threatening way. It’s very much unlike a staff meeting or project meeting where the attendees are allowed to disagree and fistfights are tolerated to assess individual aggressiveness, competitiveness, and potentials for promotion.

The training could be about a new computer system that the company bought recently. It’s usually held in a training room equipped with fully working workstations with internet access disabled for obvious reasons. Coffee and doughnuts are provided. It’s been scientifically proven that caffeine and sugar are very good for keeping you alert and to ensure that you won’t be left out when the instructor makes a fool of himself.

The training is usually conducted by the vendor. Upon arrival, he’d write his name, phone number, and e-mail address on the board for everybody to scrutinize for country of origin, pedigree, and religious affiliation. Before the class begins, as he introduces himself, he’d point to the information and tell the attendees that they are free to contact him for additional information on the system. But before you do that, be sure to check with your manager first as the charges maybe stiff.

As with the other classes that you had previously attended, this one could be for the ages. In fact, it could be so boring that keeping your eyes open during the class would be a feat worthy of the Guinness Book of World Records. But, of course, training on a newly purchased computer system must be treated with an aura of respectability. After all, it cost the company hundreds of thousands of dollars. Management wouldn’t be pleased if employees treat it as a joke.

When coffee isn’t enough to keep you from falling asleep, you can doodle, write something for your blog, or imagine the instructor in his leopard-striped underwear. If neither helps, darn, the class must be really that bad. Go ahead. Take a nap. By then, everybody must be snoring.

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Entry filed under: Blogroll, daily prompt. Tags: , , , , , .

The Lady on the Train A Matter of Conscience

8 Comments Add your own

  • 1. fortuitous faery  |  August 28, 2009 at 4:06 pm

    sounds as fun as being on jury duty…but at least you get paid more for your idle time, right? 😛

    Reply
    • 2. plaridel  |  August 28, 2009 at 5:04 pm

      fortuitious faery:

      it’s part of the deal whether you’re a contractor or a regular employee. it’s the vendor who usually provides for the coffee and doughnuts, though.

      Reply
  • 3. Walongbote  |  August 28, 2009 at 7:18 pm

    i think that’s part of working naman talaga, becAUse as a new techn0logy disc0vered, new things has to be impROveD.. Bka mapagiwanan db? Bka typewriter pa din gamit sa ofFice.Hehe..

    Reply
    • 4. plaridel  |  August 28, 2009 at 8:37 pm

      walongbote:

      it’s so true. kaya lang, it should be presented in an interesting manner. otherwise, it would be a total waste of time.

      Reply
  • 5. J.Kulisap  |  August 31, 2009 at 1:11 am

    Nasa instructor o guro ang ikinagaganda ng isang produkto, pag-aaral o inihahaing kaalaman.

    Alamin kung nasaang kiliti, ilang beses na akong napag-uutusang maging “hostess” sa ilang okasyon.

    Nakakapikon kapag tinulugan ka ng mga tagapakinig.

    Kapag napanganga ka sa tao sa unahan, wow..ang galing niya.

    Pero kapag nakakita ka ng humihikab hikab, putsa…uwian na o kaya lunch na ba?

    Reply
    • 6. plaridel  |  August 31, 2009 at 4:33 pm

      j.Kulisap:

      you’re right on the money. making presentations is an art that so few have ever mastered.

      Reply
  • 7. J.Kulisap  |  September 1, 2009 at 2:12 am

    Makwarta ang matamis ang dila.

    Plus factor na lang kapag aliw na aliw ang mga nakikinig sayo.

    Reply
    • 8. plaridel  |  September 1, 2009 at 11:37 am

      j.Kulisap:

      talagang nagiging makwarta. tingnan mo si raul, gonzalez, cerge remonde, eduardo ermita, anthony golez, atbp. bakit nga naman hindi, pag sila’y nagsalita, ang taong bayan ay napapanganga. sulit ang ibinabayad ng gobierno sa kanila.

      Reply

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