Killing the Blues

November 18, 2009 at 9:43 am 4 comments

and then you’ve ask me
just to leave you
to set out on my own
and get what I need to
you want me to find
what i’ve already had

-Robert Plant & Alison Krauss

I’m flying to Baltimore tomorrow, so I’ll be out of the blogging scene for three weeks. I take it as a great opportunity to visit the East Coast in the last days of autumn before winter sets in. The colors of autumn are a sight to behold with leaves of trees in hues of red, orange, and gold. Albert Camus said it best, “Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower.”

I’ll be in the DC area for a while and then sneak to New York if I can. Even though UI had lived there only for a few months, I still consider it home. It’s probably because my closest relatives live in the area.

I went to New York from the Philippines to follow someone who I thought was the one. But it wasn’t meant to be. I remember our last date. It was a trip to Long Island to visit her former roommate who was by then married. At that time, I was unemployed, living on the charity of my cousins, and thinking of joining the army. She must have found me a boring companion, indeed.

A month later, I took the Greyhound bus to Chicago determined to be on my own, then headed West to meet my destiny as many had done before me.

People tell me it takes a lot of spunk to pull off something like that, but not really. It was like being thrown out of the ocean with a rope to save you from drowning. In the event it didn’t pan out, I had three options: go back to my cousins in New York, take my dad’s offer of plane ticket back to the Philippines, or jump off the Golden Gate bridge and kiss this life good-bye. Fortunately, I didn’t have to use any of them. As they say, if there’s a will, there’s gotta be a way. It was tough sailing in the beginning, but I survived.

She has since moved to New Jersey. I got her current address and phone number on the Internet. I wonder if I should attempt to contact her after all these years. I’d like her to look at me now. I didn’t end up as a total failure after all. At the same time, I feel that maybe it’s time to just let go. There’s no point in picking up the pieces of the past and try to put them back together again. I’ve got this life to live now and so does she. It’s time to let bygones be bygones.

Autumn is a time for reflection. For me, it’s not thinking about the past and what might have been. Rather, it’s about being grateful for how life has turned out to be. It might not have been what I’ve expected, but it’s still alright. Life’s what you make it.

Sighs, I’m holding on to her number handy just in case.

Entry filed under: Blogroll, daily prompt. Tags: , , , .

on dining out Happy Thanksgiving

4 Comments Add your own

  • 1. AC  |  November 19, 2009 at 8:59 pm

    Awwww…. *sigh*

    “autumn is a time for reflection. for me, it’s not thinking about the past and what might have been. rather, it’s about being grateful for how life has turned out to be. it might not have been what i’ve expected, but it’s still alright. life’s what you make it.”

    So I guess that’s what Autumn has represented in 500 Days of Summer. Hehehe.. may aftermath pa rin sa kin. 😆

    • 2. plaridel  |  December 7, 2009 at 4:22 pm


      i’m buying the movie on dvd. expected release is before christmas.

  • 3. J.Kulisap  |  November 19, 2009 at 10:53 pm

    Nakanaman tol…emoness ka rin. lahat na lang ng bloggers ganito ang tema ngayon, magpapasko kasi.

    Ok..kalimutan mo na siya, humanap ka na ng iba.

    • 4. plaridel  |  December 7, 2009 at 4:29 pm


      it’s so easy for you to say, but maybe you’re right.


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