Going for my Annual Physical Exam

January 29, 2011 at 10:22 am 11 comments

Sign For the Blind

 
It’s time for my annual physical exam on Monday. It was supposed to be last month, but I had it postponed due to the holidays. I feel fine. I’m back to seven pounds less than my ideal weight. I’m in such a good shape that my doctor would be glad to see me. However, if you think I relish the idea of going, banish the thought. I look forward to it like going for a root canal.

I don’t mind the blood test at all as long the person drawing the blood is experienced. A novice will take several tries to find the right vein causing unnecessary punctures in your arm. I tell you, it’s something you don’t want to experience, especially when you’re paying the bill.

I don’t mind the stress test on the treadmill, either, although I may look like Frankestein with wires attached to my body.

What I find distressing and outright embarrassing is the actual physical exam. As you see, I’m a very private person. I’m not comfortable stripping and be examined stark naked like a dressed chicken.

You know the drill. As you lay there on the table, the doctor scrutinizes every inch of your body for any sign of trouble. Then, he asks you to spread your legs and expose yourself so he can grope your testicles, I guess, for no other reason than to prove who’s the boss. If that’s not humiliating enough, he follows it up by poking his finger into your butt with authority.

In spite of everything, going for a regular physical exam is something you gotta do. It’s what they call preventive maintenance. Your body is like a car that, even though it’s running great, it still needs to be checked on a regular basis. More importantly, it helps keep the doctor like your auto mechanic employed.

A few days later, it’s customary for the doctor to call and notify you of the results of all the tests done.

“Everything looks good,” he’d say. “Keep on the good work.”

You heave a sigh of relief. That’s what doctors are for. With a few exceptions, they get paid to tell you that you’re well.

If your’re curious to know what happened in my last physical, click Here.

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Entry filed under: Blogroll, daily prompt. Tags: , , , , .

An Unexpected Call Shall We Write Our Own Obituary?

11 Comments Add your own

  • 1. sub  |  January 30, 2011 at 7:23 pm

    waaaaah! i never liked being examined. :(i remember one time when i had to see my gyne and the spotlight is on my ‘pearl’ gosh, i called my mom and cried!

    anyway, congrats for having that healthy body! Thank the Lord for that 🙂

    Reply
    • 2. plaridel  |  January 31, 2011 at 3:49 pm

      sub:

      i find this kind of examination really embarassing. medical folks, however, consider it a non-event. they insist that once they’ve seen one, they’ve seen them all.

      anyway, i went to the doctor’s office this morning only to be told he called in sick. i get a reprieve until wednesday next week. 🙂

      Reply
      • 3. sub  |  January 31, 2011 at 5:43 pm

        hahaha now that’s funny! 😆 after checkin’ on others making sure they’re well — the following day, he’ll call in sick! 😆

        Reply
  • 4. Neutral Universe  |  January 31, 2011 at 1:37 pm

    I never had this kind of examination. I read the other post and I had to laugh because you hit it bigtime to think of releasing “methane gas and some byproducts on his face”.

    Reply
    • 5. plaridel  |  January 31, 2011 at 3:57 pm

      neutral universe:

      i think you should consider it. as i said in my post, our body is like a car. it needs routine check up to keep it running like a charm. besides, you don’t want it to grow old before its time. 🙂

      Reply
  • 6. Judy Marie Santiago  |  February 1, 2011 at 4:28 pm

    Wah. I also don’t like physical exams. Especially the one you said about novice nurses who are not experts in doing the blood tests. But I haven’t experienced being scrutinized naked. Tomorrow I’ll be having my checkup, been suffering from gastritis these past few weeks and hopefully tomorrow the findings will be as great as yours. Good luck on our health!

    Reply
    • 7. plaridel  |  February 1, 2011 at 11:33 pm

      judy:

      gastritis is the pits. get well soon!

      Reply
  • 8. wildstorm  |  February 1, 2011 at 4:55 pm

    I don’t think most of us care for these physical exams. Even during pregnancy and birth I sure hated all those exams.

    Reply
    • 9. plaridel  |  February 1, 2011 at 11:34 pm

      wildstorm:

      thank goodness, it’s only once a year for me. 🙂

      Reply
  • 10. splice  |  February 4, 2011 at 12:49 am

    At first I thought the title read “going for my anal physical exam”. All the same, the doctor still “[poked] his finger into your butt with authority.” I’m glad for you. It’s over 😀

    Reply
    • 11. plaridel  |  February 4, 2011 at 3:18 pm

      splice:

      sadly, it’s not over yet. the doctor called in sick at the last minute. it’s been rescheduled for this coming wednesday. 😦

      Reply

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