The Unexpected Guest

February 4, 2015 at 4:18 pm 43 comments

for friday fictioneers 100-word challenge 6 February 2015

Melanie Greenwood
Photo Credit: Melanie Greenwood

Jacob couldn’t be any happier for his sister on her wedding day.

As little kids, they had big dreams. He’d be a firefighter. She’d be a teacher. They’d live close to each other when they had their own family.

One day while they were playing hide-and-seek in London’s Kew gardens, tragedy struck.

“Do something!“ Sarah screamed at their parents when she couldn’t find him. Only later that they knew he was kidnapped and murdered.

Jacob was teary-eyed as his spirit watched his sister walk down the aisle. Nobody noticed he was even there. All attention was on the beautiful bride.

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Entry filed under: Blogroll, friday fictioneers. Tags: , , , .

wordless wednesday: brown is the new green weekly photo challenge: scale

43 Comments Add your own

  • 1. latasun  |  February 4, 2015 at 6:40 pm

    hoping Jacob’s spirit is a happy one now.. and Sarah will look up to the heavens before she says ‘I do’.

    Reply
    • 2. plaridel  |  February 4, 2015 at 8:14 pm

      latasun:

      that’s a nice thought. 🙂

      Reply
  • 3. elmowrites  |  February 4, 2015 at 7:58 pm

    Interesting take – to come at this sort of story from the point of view of the victim’s spirit. I got a bit muddled by the final sentence. I think you mean “his sister” not “her”? Otherwise, it’s good to know he’s still close beside her, even after death.

    Reply
    • 4. plaridel  |  February 4, 2015 at 8:13 pm

      jen:

      duly noted and corrected. thanks for pointing that out. 🙂

      Reply
  • 5. FabricatingFiction  |  February 4, 2015 at 10:36 pm

    A really sweet story.

    Reply
    • 6. plaridel  |  February 5, 2015 at 10:01 am

      louise:

      thank you kindly.

      Reply
  • 7. Sandra  |  February 5, 2015 at 3:33 am

    Lovely story.

    Reply
    • 8. plaridel  |  February 5, 2015 at 10:02 am

      sandra:

      thank you. happy that you liked it.

      Reply
  • 9. draliman  |  February 5, 2015 at 5:41 am

    So sad, particularly the ending. At least he was there in spirit.

    Reply
    • 10. plaridel  |  February 5, 2015 at 10:02 am

      draliman:

      at least, he made it to his sister’s wedding even in spirit.

      Reply
  • 11. aliciajamtaas  |  February 5, 2015 at 1:44 pm

    Lovely description of the the lingering love between brother and sister.

    Reply
    • 12. plaridel  |  February 5, 2015 at 3:02 pm

      alicia:

      it was a tragedy that she lost him. at the same, he was happy that she had moved on.

      Reply
  • 13. Liz Young  |  February 5, 2015 at 1:55 pm

    She’ll be thinking of her brother too and missing hime.

    Reply
    • 14. plaridel  |  February 5, 2015 at 3:04 pm

      liz:

      that is true.

      Reply
  • 15. Priceless Joy  |  February 5, 2015 at 2:03 pm

    That was both sad and sweet. No one noticed he was there and all eyes were on his sister. Sweet.

    Reply
    • 16. plaridel  |  February 5, 2015 at 3:03 pm

      priceless joy:

      i don’t think he cared about being ignored. it was supposed to be. 🙂

      Reply
      • 17. Priceless Joy  |  February 5, 2015 at 3:20 pm

        Yes, I that’s what I got from it. Thank you.

        Reply
        • 18. plaridel  |  February 6, 2015 at 12:00 pm

          priceless joy:

          🙂

          Reply
          • 19. Priceless Joy  |  February 6, 2015 at 12:03 pm

            I really liked the story, even though it was sad. It was also very touching because you relayed his love for his sister.

            Reply
            • 20. plaridel  |  February 6, 2015 at 12:07 pm

              priceless joy:

              one of the best compliments i’d received so far. thank you. 🙂

              Reply
              • 21. Priceless Joy  |  February 6, 2015 at 12:24 pm

                You’re welcome and it’s true.

                Reply
  • 22. Rachel Bjerke  |  February 5, 2015 at 2:49 pm

    Aw, very tragic. And yet so sweet.

    Reply
    • 23. plaridel  |  February 5, 2015 at 3:03 pm

      rachel:

      thank you. you’re very kind.

      Reply
  • 24. kirsten  |  February 5, 2015 at 10:40 pm

    Sweet and sad at the same time!

    Reply
    • 25. plaridel  |  February 6, 2015 at 12:00 pm

      kirsten:

      thank you for reading. much appreciated.

      Reply
  • 26. rochellewisoff  |  February 6, 2015 at 1:06 am

    Dear Plaridel,

    I’d be willing to bet that the sister feels Jacob’s spirit. Sweet story.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Reply
    • 27. plaridel  |  February 6, 2015 at 12:01 pm

      rochelle:

      i think so, too. 🙂

      Reply
  • 28. patrickprinsloo  |  February 6, 2015 at 2:15 am

    Tough on the family. But at least they were strong enough to lead normal lives despite the tragedy. Well written.

    Reply
    • 29. plaridel  |  February 6, 2015 at 12:01 pm

      patrick:

      i’m glad you liked it. thank you.

      Reply
  • 30. Suzanne Joshi  |  February 6, 2015 at 10:47 am

    Lovely story, Plaridel. At least her brother was there in spirit. You might want to change “walked” down the aisle to “walk” down the aisle. Well done. 🙂 — Suzanne

    Reply
    • 31. plaridel  |  February 6, 2015 at 12:01 pm

      suzanne:

      good catch. duly noted and corrected. thank you.

      Reply
  • 32. Björn Rudberg (brudberg)  |  February 6, 2015 at 10:50 pm

    Somehow it was good that he could be there at her big day.. I think she feels his presence and his tears.

    Reply
    • 33. plaridel  |  February 7, 2015 at 10:03 am

      björn:

      he wouldn’t miss it for the world.

      Reply
  • 34. Amy Reese  |  February 7, 2015 at 1:34 pm

    Nice take, Plaridel. A lovely day for memories. I hope his sister felt his presence there and his happiness for her.

    Reply
    • 35. plaridel  |  February 7, 2015 at 3:19 pm

      amy:

      thank you. i think brothers and sisters have a bond that survives even after death.

      Reply
  • 36. milliethom  |  February 8, 2015 at 5:24 am

    What a sad but lovely story, Plaridel. That Jacob’s spirit should be there at his sister’s wedding is extremely poignant – but also comforting. Not even death could destroy the strong bond that tied them. I. too, hope she felt his presence on her special day.

    Reply
    • 37. plaridel  |  February 8, 2015 at 12:44 pm

      millie:

      thank you. i’m glad you liked it.

      Reply
  • 38. afairymind  |  February 8, 2015 at 5:50 am

    This is a really sweet little story. It’s a shame his sister doesn’t know he’s there – I like to think that somehow she senses his presence…

    Reply
    • 39. plaridel  |  February 8, 2015 at 12:44 pm

      afairymind:

      i believe she did sense his presence somehow.

      Reply
  • 40. Melanie  |  February 8, 2015 at 9:27 am

    Seems this picture is a good one for ghosts. It’s nice to think our lost loved ones are still by our side.

    Reply
    • 41. plaridel  |  February 8, 2015 at 12:45 pm

      melanie:

      i agree that something about the picture evokes such kind of setting.

      Reply
  • 42. Emily Livingstone  |  February 9, 2015 at 2:12 pm

    I like your take! Mine has a ghost, too. I’m glad it ends happily, if a little bittersweet!

    Reply
    • 43. plaridel  |  February 9, 2015 at 3:19 pm

      emily:

      thank you. quite a few stories this week do deal with ghosts. kinda spooky.

      Reply

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