Crossing Over

October 26, 2016 at 10:57 am 28 comments

For Friday Fictioneers 100-Word Challenge: 28 October 2016

 Peter Abbey
Photo Credit: Peter Abbey

Olivia was his best friend. She accepted him, although he was born with one leg shorter than the other.

Ethan wanted to take their relationship to the next level. At the same time, he worried about what her reaction would be.

He told her he loved her.

She told him she loved him too but like a brother.

“Don’t cross the bridge until you come to it,” Ethan kept telling himself before she turned him down.

He had done it and the pain was unbearable.

Ethan climbed over the railing and looked down below.

He found the dark waters inviting.

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Entry filed under: Blogroll, daily prompt, friday fictioneers. Tags: , , , .

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28 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Iain Kelly  |  October 26, 2016 at 1:30 pm

    No! Don’t jump Ethan. Great story, really felt his pain at the rejection.

    Reply
    • 2. plaridel  |  October 27, 2016 at 5:02 pm

      iain:

      i hope he hears you.

      Reply
  • 3. aliciajamtaas  |  October 26, 2016 at 4:41 pm

    The simplicity of this broke my heart. I love where you took the idea of the bridge. Kudos.

    Reply
    • 4. plaridel  |  October 27, 2016 at 5:02 pm

      alicia:

      it’s very generous of you to say that. thank you.

      Reply
  • 5. rgayer55  |  October 27, 2016 at 3:50 am

    I always hated it when girls said they love you like a brother. They might as well say they love you like a tree stump.

    Rejection is tough when you’re a teenager, which is how I picture them. No need to kill yourself over it though. She’s not the only guppy in the fishbowl.

    Reply
    • 6. plaridel  |  October 27, 2016 at 5:01 pm

      russell:

      life is tough. being rejected is a phase we all have to go through.

      Reply
  • 7. draliman  |  October 27, 2016 at 4:55 am

    Oh no, I hope Ethan thinks twice and realises there are more fish in the sea.

    Reply
    • 8. plaridel  |  October 27, 2016 at 5:01 pm

      draliman:

      i agree totally.

      Reply
  • 9. Joy Pixley  |  October 27, 2016 at 5:13 am

    Oh no, don’t do it Ethan! There will be other loves, believe it or not at this age. Good story — really captured that first heartbreak feeling well.

    Reply
    • 10. plaridel  |  October 27, 2016 at 5:01 pm

      joy:

      sounds like a good advice. thank you.

      Reply
  • 11. rochellewisoff  |  October 27, 2016 at 5:21 am

    Dear Plaridel,

    I hope someone stops Ethan before it’s too late. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Reply
    • 12. plaridel  |  October 27, 2016 at 5:00 pm

      rochelle:

      me, too. thank you.

      Reply
  • 13. gahlearner  |  October 27, 2016 at 6:38 am

    Oh no, that’s too sad. Poor Ethan. Very effective story, you describe his thoughts, and readers’ imagination fills in the passionate feelings.

    Reply
    • 14. plaridel  |  October 27, 2016 at 5:00 pm

      gahlearner:

      i’m glad it worked somehow. i had struggled fitting the story in 100 words.

      Reply
  • 15. Dale  |  October 27, 2016 at 8:37 pm

    This perfectly represents how I see today’s youth – incapable of taking rejection because they’ve been brought up believing they deserve everything….
    It is a very sad thing!

    Reply
    • 16. plaridel  |  October 28, 2016 at 3:15 pm

      dale:

      i thing being involved in sports can help.

      Reply
  • 17. Perry Block (@PerryBlock)  |  October 27, 2016 at 10:07 pm

    Hey, I have one leg shorter than the other. Thanks for getting me dumped and then bumping me off! I would have preferred a musical….

    Reply
    • 18. plaridel  |  October 28, 2016 at 3:14 pm

      perry:

      that’s funny. 🙂

      Reply
  • 19. Zee  |  October 28, 2016 at 10:43 am

    Ooooh!!😵😲😵😲

    Reply
    • 20. plaridel  |  October 28, 2016 at 3:14 pm

      zee:

      he should man up and accept that rejection is part of life.

      Reply
  • 21. Michael Wynn  |  October 29, 2016 at 12:56 am

    I feel for Ethan and unrequited love can do that to a guy, but is anything worth that? Nicely done

    Reply
    • 22. plaridel  |  October 29, 2016 at 10:05 pm

      mick:

      i don’t think it’s taking his life for it. he must learn to move on.

      Reply
  • 23. PHZE0N3TlMtJ7IuBRUXxGr7joO/A5ETiJs0WWOLDu8Q=  |  October 29, 2016 at 9:37 am

    Short, complete and so very powerful!

    Reply
    • 24. plaridel  |  October 29, 2016 at 10:04 pm

      athling:

      your comment is deeply appreciated. thank you.

      Reply
  • 25. ansumani  |  October 30, 2016 at 5:19 pm

    Ethan’s handicap adds a layer to this sad story. Maybe if Ethan was accepted by many people we wouldn’t have misunderstood Olivia’s acceptance and her romantic rejection would have been more bearable. Nice story.

    Reply
    • 26. plaridel  |  October 30, 2016 at 11:15 pm

      ansumani:

      that’s a very thoughtful comment. thank you.

      Reply
  • 27. creatingahome  |  October 31, 2016 at 2:28 am

    No love… it will hurt for a while but life will go on.

    Reply
    • 28. plaridel  |  November 1, 2016 at 9:30 am

      creatingahome:

      hopefully, he doesn’t jump over to realize that.

      Reply

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