She’s a Big Girl Now
October 7, 2015 at 1:55 pm 44 comments
For Friday Fictioneers 100-Word Challenge: 9 October 2015
Photo Credit: Ted Strutz
Love is like a merry-go-round. It takes you into an exhilarating ride. But it also makes you feel dizzy, unable to think straight.
After dating for six months, Jeremy wanted her body and Emily couldn’t resist him anymore.
Friends often wondered what Emily saw in him. He was a tattoo artist and a trouble-maker at school.
“What will my parents think?” she asked.
“You’re a big girl now.”
Alone in his room, they did it.
“It’ll hurt at first,” he cooed. “But don’t worry about it. You’re in good hands.”
Moments later, it was over. Emily had her first tattoo.
Entry filed under: Blogroll, friday fictioneers. Tags: fiction, humor, relationships, teen love.
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1. Francesca Smith | October 7, 2015 at 2:18 pm
Great twist at the end. I enjoyed this story.
2. plaridel | October 7, 2015 at 5:58 pm
fran:
thank you. i’m glad you liked it. π
3. aliciajamtaas | October 7, 2015 at 5:31 pm
Ah, very well done. βItβll hurt at first,β he cooed. βBut donβt worry about it. Youβre in good hands.β Deceptive line that plays out well.
4. plaridel | October 7, 2015 at 5:59 pm
alicia:
gotcha! π
5. Priceless Joy | October 7, 2015 at 6:16 pm
Hahaha! You sure had me fooled. π
6. plaridel | October 7, 2015 at 11:10 pm
priceless joy:
awesome! i’m glad it worked for you. π
7. Lata Sunil | October 7, 2015 at 9:28 pm
Lol… it was a tattoo…aha
8. plaridel | October 7, 2015 at 11:11 pm
lata:
i didn’t mean to mislead. honest. π
9. Sandra | October 7, 2015 at 11:59 pm
I was expecting a twist but not that one. Well done π
10. plaridel | October 8, 2015 at 9:23 am
sandra:
i thought i’d more fun to make the girl the tattoo artist, but i just couldn’t limit to 100 words. π
11. FabricatingFiction | October 8, 2015 at 2:27 am
Great twist!
12. plaridel | October 8, 2015 at 9:23 am
louise:
thank you for reading. it’s much appreciated.
13. micklively | October 8, 2015 at 3:13 am
I don’t like tattoos but I do like….
14. plaridel | October 8, 2015 at 9:22 am
mick:
i’m glad you enjoyed reading it. thank you
15. Leigh W. Smith | October 8, 2015 at 7:03 am
Although I felt like this was going to turn at the end, probably just because I read you so often, Plaridel, I was pleased to see that I had no idea where it would turn! Very well done–a definite keeper here (put this one in the ebook/book if you’re making one, hint, hint).
16. plaridel | October 8, 2015 at 9:22 am
leigh:
what a great compliment. it’s much appreciated.
17. draliman | October 8, 2015 at 7:26 am
Ha, the twisty last line made me smile π
18. plaridel | October 8, 2015 at 9:22 am
draliman:
thank you. it had fun writing it. π
19. gahlearner | October 8, 2015 at 9:28 am
You led us along nicely (althought I saw this coming as soon as you mentioned the tatoo artist.) π
20. plaridel | October 9, 2015 at 9:50 am
gahlearner:
just as i thought, some folks could already sense how it would turn out right from the start. π
21. Suzanne Joshi | October 9, 2015 at 4:17 am
Well written with a great twist at the end, Plaridel. Well done. π — Suzanne
22. plaridel | October 9, 2015 at 9:49 am
suzanne:
i had fun writing it. thank you. π
23. rochellewisoff | October 9, 2015 at 4:43 am
Dear Plaridel,
A bit of a misdirection. Nicely handled.
Shalom,
Rochelle
24. plaridel | October 9, 2015 at 9:49 am
rochelle:
i’m sorry if i led you astray. π
25. ansumani | October 9, 2015 at 5:56 am
ha ha ….tried to fool us there with him wanting her body et all….Nice twist and well written.
26. plaridel | October 9, 2015 at 9:49 am
ansumani:
thank you. i’m glad it made you smile. π
27. BjΓΆrn Rudberg (brudberg) | October 9, 2015 at 10:42 am
I wonder if having a tatto might not been worse… She’ll have to carry it for the rest of her life.
28. plaridel | October 10, 2015 at 10:11 am
bjΓΆrn:
the first tattoo might just be the start. she’d probably get more later.
29. Dale | October 10, 2015 at 10:30 am
Love how you brought us in one direction and poof! 90-degree turn!
30. plaridel | October 11, 2015 at 3:24 pm
dale:
you could blame it on the merry-go-round photo prompt. π
31. The Mom Who Runs | October 10, 2015 at 9:52 pm
Well played. Love the twist! Good to laugh after the heaviness of my story …thanks again for stopping by to read and comment on mine!
32. plaridel | October 11, 2015 at 3:24 pm
sara:
thank you, too, for stopping by. i’m glad you liked my little piece.
33. The Writer's Village | October 11, 2015 at 6:35 pm
Ooh. Got us. Good job.
Randy
34. plaridel | October 13, 2015 at 9:20 am
randy:
you’re comment was very encouraging. thank you.
35. rgayer55 | October 12, 2015 at 3:23 am
Outstanding finish. You set that one up well, then knocked it out of the park.
36. plaridel | October 13, 2015 at 9:19 am
russell
i’m glad it worked for you. thank you.
37. luckyjc007 | January 28, 2016 at 11:29 am
It’s amazing how our thoughts seem to have a track of their own sometimes…and then get derailed! Great story, surprising twist.π
38. plaridel | January 29, 2016 at 4:04 pm
luckyjc007:
it’s what makes writing fun, isn’t it? π
39. Mr. Mel | April 4, 2017 at 7:24 pm
The mind always wanting to go it’s own way, so many times needing to be pull back. You pulled.
40. plaridel | April 5, 2017 at 4:17 pm
Mr. Mel:
thank you for the generous comment. much appreciated.
41. simplygiselle | August 8, 2017 at 9:07 am
love and merry-go-rounds… both leave me nauseated…
42. Neha Sharma | August 5, 2018 at 11:52 am
Some clever misdirection! haha π
43. plaridel | August 18, 2018 at 11:21 am
neha:
glad you took the bait. π
44. Neha Sharma | August 19, 2018 at 2:49 am
Yep. You got me π π